Parenting styles play a crucial role in shaping a child’s future. Previously, we have explored various parenting approaches, including positive parenting, peaceful parenting, and child-centered parenting. Today, we’ll dive into another style known as helicopter parenting.

At Geeklama, we understand the importance of fostering independence and critical thinking in children. Our coding classes help kids develop problem-solving skills and confidence by encouraging them to explore and learn on their own. If you want to empower your child with essential 21st-century skills, try a free trial class today!

Helicopter parenting is a term used to describe an overprotective parenting style where parents excessively monitor and intervene in their child's life. According to Dr. Foo Koong Hean in Intercultural Parenting, helicopter parents tend to hover over their children, making decisions for them and preventing them from developing independence. While these parents may have good intentions, their over-involvement can hinder their child’s ability to solve problems, take responsibility, and build resilience.

Helicopter parents may exhibit behaviors such as:

• Constantly checking on their child’s schoolwork and correcting their mistakes.
• Over-managing their child’s schedule, extracurricular activities, and friendships.
• Stepping in to solve even minor challenges, preventing the child from experiencing failure.
• Making decisions on behalf of the child without allowing their input.
• Feeling personally responsible for their child’s achievements and failures.

While parents who adopt this style may believe they are protecting their children, the effects can be counterproductive. Research suggests that children of helicopter parents may:

• Struggle with decision-making skills and self-confidence.
• Develop increased anxiety and fear of failure.
• Lack problem-solving abilities.
• Become overly dependent on parents, even in adulthood.
• Experience difficulty coping with setbacks and challenges.

If you recognize signs of helicopter parenting in your approach, here are some strategies to foster independence in your child:

1. Let Children Do Things by Themselves
You may be able to do tasks more efficiently, but allowing children to take on responsibilities helps them develop important life skills. Encourage them to complete age-appropriate tasks, such as packing their school bag, making simple meals, or managing their homework.

2. Resist the Urge to Fix Everything
It’s natural to want to step in when your child faces difficulties. However, constantly fixing things for them can prevent them from learning resilience. Instead, guide them through problem-solving by asking questions and encouraging them to find their own solutions.

3. Accept That Your Child Is a Unique Individual
It’s easy to assume your child feels the same way you do in certain situations. However, they have their own emotions and perspectives. For example, if your child is about to perform in a school event, avoid assuming they are nervous just because you would be. Let them express their feelings on their own terms.

4. Allow Your Child to Experience Failure
Failure is an important teacher. Shielding children from it deprives them of the opportunity to learn from mistakes and develop problem-solving skills. If your child forgets their lunch at home, let them figure out how to manage—whether it’s asking a friend to share or making a plan for the next time.

5. Manage Your Own Discomfort
Watching your child struggle can be difficult, but overcoming small challenges helps them grow. Remind yourself that stepping back isn’t neglecting them—it’s empowering them to become independent and confident.

6. Don’t Tie Your Self-Worth to Your Child’s Achievements

• It’s natural to feel pride in your child’s success, but defining your self-worth through their accomplishments can lead to over-involvement. Allow them to explore their own interests, make mistakes, and find their path in life.

Parenting is a journey that involves guiding, supporting, and letting go. While it’s important to be there for your child, it’s equally crucial to allow them the space to develop independence. Give them opportunities to solve problems, make decisions, and learn from their experiences.

What’s your take on helicopter parenting? Have you observed it around you? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
References

Foo, K. H. (2019). Intercultural Parenting: How Eastern and Western Parenting Styles Affect Child Development. United Kingdom: Taylor & Francis.

• Battles, M. (2021). 10 Time-Saving Tips for Busy Parents. (n.p.): Whitaker House.

At Geeklama, we don’t just teach kids how to code—we help them develop essential life skills like focus, patience, and problem-solving. Our fun, interactive classes are designed to engage kids in a way that reduces challenging behavior and boosts confidence.

Here’s what your child will gain:

• A Sense of Achievement: Completing coding projects gives kids a confidence boost.
• Improved Focus: Coding requires concentration, which can translate to better behavior at home.
• Problem-Solving Skills: Kids learn to tackle challenges head-on, reducing frustration.
• Independence: Coding empowers kids to create something on their own, fostering a sense of control.

If you’re looking for a way to help your child channel their energy into something positive, coding might be the answer. At Geeklama, we offer free trial classes for kids aged 6–17. It’s a no-pressure way to see if coding is the right fit for your child.